Hiei's Predicament
by Zurama
Summary: Whats wrong with Hiei when he has an extremely painful stomach ache? Read to find out! Please R&R! ^_^
1. Pain has no boundaries

Hiei's Predicament  
  
Disclaimer: I do not own Yu Yu Hakusho but I wish I did. Also this story has NO yaoi involved  
  
"Ughhhhhhh!" Hiei screamed in agony.  
  
He walked through the woods as the pain in his stomach pierced through him. He couldn't even run without crumbling over.  
  
"What is this?!" he said through his teeth.  
  
This was pain unlike any he's ever experienced before. If an enemy attacked him now he would be slain for sure. * He finally made it out of the woods and fell to his knees from the pain. Luckily for him, Yusuke and Kurama were walking through the park when they saw him. *  
  
"What's wrong Hiei?!" Kurama said anxiously.  
  
"P-p-pain" Hiei managed to say.  
  
"We should get him to your house quick!" Yusuke said, "I'll go get Yukina."  
  
Kurama took Hiei to his house and met the other there.  
  
"Oh, Hiei!" Yukina said, "what happened?!" she demanded.  
  
"We found him at the woods, he had fallen to his knees in pain." Kurama said.  
  
"Keep still Hiei, I'll do my best to help." Yukina said in her gentle voice as she placed her hands over Hiei's stomach and they began to emit a blue light. "Is it helping any Hiei?" she asked.  
  
"N-n-no." Hiei managed to say.  
  
"What! But why aren't my powers working?" she said in confusion.  
  
"Maybe we should get him to Koenma-sir." Botan said. She had just appeared a moment ago with her oar.  
  
"Good idea, Botan!" Kayko said.  
  
With that they all follow Botan to Spirit World and met up with Koenma.  
  
"Yo. What's up?" he said.  
  
"Hiei's hurt really bad, he can't move, without pain." Yusuke said.  
  
"Lets take a look." Koenma said.  
  
He leads Hiei to a room with a giant capsule thingy and gestures for Hiei to take a seat. Hiei then laid down and Koenma started the machine up. A blue light began at Hiei's feet and slowly reached his head.  
  
"So Ogre, what's wrong with him?" Koenma asked.  
  
"K-K-Koenma-s-s-sir, y-y-your not going to believe this!" the Blue Ogre could barely speak.  
  
"So, what is the cause of Hiei's pain?" Koenma asked again.  
  
"H-H-He's." the Blue Ogre was stuttering.  
  
"Out with it Ogre or your not going to get any dessert." Koenma convincingly said.  
  
"Hiei is.pregnant." the Ogre finally said.  
  
"WHAT!?!" everyone, including Hiei, said in unison.  
  
"How could he be pregnant!" Kuwabara said. "He's a guy! .You are a guy, right?"  
  
"OF COURSE I AM!!! YOU BAKA NINGEN!!! EVEN THINIKING I'M A WOMAN!" Hiei screamed.  
  
"So.when's the baby due?" Yusuke calmly asked.  
  
"Yusuke!" everyone yelled.  
  
"What! If he's gonna have a kid we should at least know when it's gonna happen!" Yusuke protested.  
  
"Well.he is right Hiei." Kurama said, "You don't want it coming out in the middle of a fight."  
  
"Hn." Hiei replied.  
  
"Well to answer Yusuke's question, he'll have the baby in about.four hours." Koenma said.  
  
"4 hours!" Hiei said, "Are you insane?!?"  
  
"Well I'm not the one who's been carrying it for a couple of months now." Koenma began in a singsong voice.  
  
"But he doesn't even show any signs of being pregnant." Kurama exclaimed.  
  
"Hiei." Koenma said.  
  
* Hiei took off about 12 capes draped in front of him and then his shirt*  
  
"Oh, my God!" Keiko said.  
  
"I thought I was just getting fat, so I tried to hide it." Hiei's stomach was about twice the size of a watermelon and all the guys were disgusted but all the girls, including Shizuru who just arrived, ran over to feel the baby kicking. They laid Hiei down on a bed, clothed him, and tried to comfort him. He screamed in pain.  
  
"Why.does.it.hurt.so much!" Hiei managed to say.  
  
"Well, since you are a guy we might have to cut you open.because.it ain't comin' out the normal way." Koenma said.  
  
4 hours past.  
  
"Ugggggggghhh!" Hiei screamed as he felt a quick sharp pain.  
  
"Uh, guys I think that was, a contraction." Keiko mildly said unwillingly.  
  
"Oh, no." Kurama said.  
  
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Well, this is chapter 1 and I might do one more chapter if you guys like it. ( Although, this is a short story and definitely not meant to go to far. Please R&R and since this is my first short story, be nice. ^_^ Also if you want to see a picture of Hiei pregnant I edited myself just e-mail me at Marill89381@aol.com, it's a little strange but funny still. Bye-bye! 


	2. The Birthing

Hiei's Predicament Part 2: The Birthing  
  
Disclaimer: I don't own Yu Yu Hakusho although I wish I did. And now to the much-awaited second part of Hiei's Predicament!  
  
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"It's coming!" Botan yelled across the room to Koenma.  
  
"Ogre, get some doctors in here! Stat!" Koenma ordered.  
  
Minutes later Hiei was on a hospital bed and the doctors had made an incision in his stomach. It took hours before it was all over. The object that was in Hiei's stomach was in a blanket and yet to be seen.  
  
"Well, Mr. Jaganshi," the first doctor began, "you are now the proud father of..." he opened the blanket. There were screams. "Ahhhhhhhh!"  
  
"Hey Hiei," Yusuke said laughing, "You're the proud father of a.WATERMELON!" Yusuke said laughing.  
  
"Oh dear." Keiko said.  
  
"Ogre..." Koenma said angrily, "I thought you said it was a baby."  
  
"Well," the Ogre began, "It was big and oval like an egg."  
  
"You dummy!" Koenma screamed, "Demons don't lay eggs! Well demons like Hiei anyway!"  
  
Everyone turned to Hiei who still had a huge incision in his stomach. Hiei blinked. The doctors remembered and stitched him up. Then they left startled, confused, and scared.  
  
"Whoa!" Hiei said, "I'm glad it was only a watermelon but... how and the hell did it get in there!"  
  
Koenma ran and went to get a reference book. "Hiei..." he began, "Did you perchance eat any watermelons a while ago."  
  
"Yeah, why? I had some at Kurama's house but so did everyone else it was a party..." Hiei said.  
  
* Flashback*  
  
"Here Hiei, could you give these out for me?" Kurama asked, "I'm having a party tonight."  
  
"Sure," Hiei replied.  
  
He gave out the invitations and then later on it was time for the party. Hiei came to the party and knocked on the door.  
  
"It's open!" Kurama said.  
  
Hiei sat alone as usual and went over to the table where the food was setup. Kurama only had vegetables and fruits, no meat. Hiei picked up a slice of watermelon and started eating it really fast and before Botan, who had noticed, or anyone else could tell him to slow down he was already finished.  
  
* End of Flashback*  
  
"I remember now!" Botan said, "Hiei ate a watermelon seed!"  
  
"Yup," Koenma said, "Says here in this demon health book that demons aren't allowed to eat seeds 'cause unlike human demons can't digest seeds and they will take root and grow inside the demon but a very painful experience is in store for any demon who accidentally eats one."  
  
"I'll say." Hiei said. Everyone began laughing but Kurama.  
  
"What's wrong Kurama?" Botan asked.  
  
"I just remembered," Kurama began, "I ate a grape today and forgot to remove the seed..."  
  
"Uh, oh!" everyone said in unison.  
  
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Keiko: "So this is the story to how we all found out that a demon can't eat seeds. Later on Kurama had his stomach pumped which saved him from all the pain but he didn't look so good last time I saw him."  
  
Kurama wobbles past barely standing and then falls in front of her.  
  
Keiko: "I guess he's still not completely well. So see all you guys later!"  
  
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I got a lot of review from all you guys out there. Thanks a lot! Please R&R but no flames PLEASE! Bye Bye! ^_^ 


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